Apollogy 4 Tha Wurst Speling N Thu Wurld

So I was reading my last post and noticed that I could have been thought of as a drunk the way I mispelled everything. "So use spell check" you might say. Well, I just forget about it and by the time I post, I just don't wanna go back. So I apoligize if you really have to try to understand sometimes what I'm trying to say.

Is There Some Kind Of Light I'm Missing

Weel I suppose now that I will write about the deslolation that has infultrated my mind and spirit. Through all that has happened in 4 months ie. surgery, Emma born, vascetomy, no job within sight (jobs come here and there but not in longevity). Needless to say I have had alternate things try to comsume my life. The hide and seek game is over for now. I tired of looking. In seeing this I understand that a pursuit is nescesary. I feel that somehow I have lost the key to my fathers heart. I used to feel like I could unlock it and at any time. And in the times when I couldn't. It was my "wilderness". See what I have noticed is the "The Wilderness" periods are far and few in between, when the only anwser is to physically lean upon the cross of Jesus. Other times we are lost in "The Woods" if you will and we happen to run acrossed revelation here and there. You see the woods are not desolate. You have your friends, family, Spouse, disteraction, a so called prophetic word and even a plan, also a whole lotta God told mees. The wilderness seems to be a desolate place to make your abode. It's uncomfortable, a place without advice, a place of fear of the unknown. Barren of friends and friends ideas. Absolutly no finances. You are left with you and what you think that the voice of God sounds like. You start to question "Do I know what His voice sounds like, or is it my voice" Does God always tell you good things? Does God think everything is peachy. You ask things like "Am I a Christian in compared to what I think a good Christian would look like" "Then why can't I love with purity" "Why can I not kill my motive" The only thing left to do is four things:

Pray
Be Silent
Listen
Write

In that order.
If anyone knows of a job that could suit me, please let me know, I need it:)

The Big 30

Live Worship Show

Crazy

Things have been nuts around the homestead with the new addition and school starting back up again. We need to find a rhythm so keep us in prayer please. I will post more later but for now, much love **pat..pat...peace**